Jason and Jade

There are some things you get used to, even though they're tough. Realities that you come to grips with because you have to. Things that you are able to see and deal with. That's something you learn when you do this every week. You help people to the best of your ability in the thing that you're doing or providing and that's what helps you handle and process the things you see and come up against.

But some things never get easier. Some things always kick you in the gut and twist your insides, then stay in your mind's eye long after every thing is put away. Physically you move on, but your thoughts and concerns stay behind.

I know adults are going to come through the line. That's why we do it, because they're there and we can help.

But seeing kids come through the line for food breaks my heart.
Absolutely kills me.

Saw 2 tonight.
Boy and a girl. Boy probably 13, girl maybe 9 or 10.
Jason and Jade.
They were the first thing I noticed tonight, waiting outside the Mercy House with about 12 other folks as we pulled up. In a crowd like that, the sight of children is jarring. They stand out even as they try to hang back. Jade's clothes were small on her, even for a 10 yr. old. She had jet black hair that stopped at her shoulders and she looked like she hadn't had a chance to wash lately.

They weren't with anyone who looked like a parent. They came on bikes and were with a young guy who looked to be about 20 -23.
The young guy was the first one in line for a plate, while Jason and Jade were in the back. We took them to the front of the line and let them eat first. I told them if they needed anything else to come find me. Jade came a little later and asked if she could cover her plate with another and carry it with her. I told her she could just have another plate and take them both. Same for Jason. We also gave them a whole blueberry coffeecake to take with them.

They didn't stay long, so we didn't get to find out much about them or their situation. Both of them thanked me for their plates as they were leaving.

Leaving to where, who knows? I hope and pray they're off the street, hopefully in a house somewhere.
It's not going to help my sleep tonight to think of the situations they could have left and gone to.
And the questions......
Where are the parents?
Why aren't they with them?
Who's the guy with them?
Are they in school?
Are they getting the basics they need?
Where are they sleeping?

I keep thinking I should have been more inquisitive and pushed a little bit to see what their deal was. I regret not doing that. Next time I will.
I should have this time.

I hope this was just a random thing and that things are actually okay for them and they won't need to come back. But I keep thinking that this was 9:00 at night in the parking lot of a men's shelter in a rough part of town.

I hope I get to see them again.
I'll see them in my mind all week.


I'll post tomorrow about all the other stuff.

g